Phineas and Ferb Porn Story: Dear Diary – Chapter 2

Yes, I have decided to add more chapters to this. And now finally the second one is up!

Dear Diary,

Okay, so today I wake up to the sound of drilling and jackhammers. Jackhammers!!! Seriously, how can Mom not hear them even if she is across the street playing bridge with Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro?!

The moment I heard the jackhammers I knew it was going to be another stupid, typical day in the life of Candace Flynn. I was going to go outside, find Phineas and Ferb building another one of their crazy contraptions, try to bust them for it, and fail miserably.

I sighed, got up, and when downstairs to pour myself a bowl of cereal for breakfast. Fruity Rainbow Flakes. Again. Seriously, if I hadnt quit my modeling job for Gaston LeMode, I could be famous by now and be eating Candace Os. And why did I quit my modeling job? Because I had to bust Phineas and Ferb. Stupid brothers, theyre always ruining everything.

After I finished my cereal, I decided Id better go outside and see what crazy thing the boys were building today. One peek out the back door and my worst fears were realized. There was Phineas, standing in the middle of the yard with piles of building stuff around him, looking at a clipboard, and there was Ferb, halfway up what looked like the half-finished skeleton of a Ferris wheel, using one of those hose-thingys that makes sparks.

I ran out into the yard to begin my usual spiel. What are you freaks doing? I shouted.

Building a Ferris wheel, Phineas said. He showed me the picture on his clipboard. It was one of those blueprint thingys, of a big Ferris wheel. You wanna help?

Why would I wanna help you guys? I yelled. Poor, stupid Phineas. No matter how many times I try to bust him and Ferb, he never seems to get the picture that I do not approve of what they do.

Phineas shrugged. Suit yourself, he said, but make sure you swing by when its finished. Its gonna be awesome!!! He turned away from me. Hows the welding going, Ferb?

Ferb looked down at him and gave him a thumbs-up.

Great. Cmon down and we can talk about the cart design. He left.

I growled under my breath and turned to run across the street to the Garcia-Shapiros. Then I remembered how Mrs. Garcia-Shapiro always takes forever when she answers the door, asking me just about every question under the sun. I didnt have time for that. So instead I pulled out my phone and hit 1, Moms speed dial number.

I waited impatiently while the phone rang four times. Then, finally, I heard her say, Hello?

Mom! Whyd you it take you four whole rings to answer the phone? I demanded.

Well, I was driving and had to wait for a stoplight to get my phone out, Candace, Mom said. She sounded annoyed.

Didnt we agree that when I call you, you pick up by the second ring?

Candace, just tell me what you wanted to tell me.

Okay- Phineas and Ferb are building a giant enormous Ferris wheel in the backyard!

Like always, my mom sighed and began talking in the tone of voice she would use if she were talking to a sulking kindergartener. Candace, I have to go pick up some groceries and Im halfway to the store already. Ill see the giant enormous Ferris wheel when I get back, okay?

Ugh! I shouted, and hung up. Why is Mom always busy when Phineas and Ferb are up to no good?

I heard a voice behind me. Hey Candace.

I was not in the mood for friendly conversation. Could you just bug off?! I snapped. I turned around to see who was bothering me. You can imagine how horrified I was when I saw that it was Jeremy.

Whoa, is something wrong, Candace? he asked. He looked so concerned. It was so sweet. But I didnt have time to enjoy it right then- I was too embarrassed for yelling at him. My face was redder than my blouse.

Im sorry, Jeremy, I apologized. I didnt realize it was you.

Is something wrong? he asked again. Aw. Isnt he great?

Its just Phineas and Ferb, I said. Theyre always up to something. They get away with everything! My mom never believes me when I tell her what theyre doing!

Jeremy put his hand on my shoulder. Instantly I felt a lot better.

Maybe you should worry less about what your brothers are doing and focus more on your own life, he said. With all the time you spend trying to bust your brothers, you could be doing lots of fun stuff. He looked up at the Ferris wheel, which by this time was finished and was like a kajillion times taller than our house. Besides, your brothers make pretty cool stuff. Why dont you enjoy it every once and awhile?

I shrugged. I guess youre right.

He smiled at me. Ferris wheel with me? he asked.

I had to think for a moment. Half of me didnt want anything to do with Phineas and Ferb or their crazy contraptions, unless that something involved busting them. But the other half wanted so bad to do something with Jeremy that it didnt matter.

In the end, that second half won. Okay, I said. Just one problem- Im afraid of heights, remember?

Oh yeah, he said. But remember, you rode that one at the state fair.

Im still a little scared, I admitted.

Dont worry, Ill hold you hand the whole time. He took my hand, and my heart all but exploded.

Okay, you win, I said, and together we walked over to the Ferris wheel.

Phineas was standing next to Ferb, who was operating the wheel with a giant lever. Nice to see you Candace! he called. You want a ride? Good choice! Ferb pulled on the lever, and an empty seat came to the bottom. Jeremy held it steady for me to climb in, and then sat next to me, taking my hand again.

And you know what?

He did hold it the whole time.