Phineas and Ferb Pornography Story: AlakaFerb Chapter Four

Phineas and Ferb Pornography Story: AlakaFerb Chapter Four

Chapter Four: Mission Important

Candace, meanwhile, was out and about on the no-longer-fun bike ride with Jeremy and his evil little sister, Suzy. Candace was sandwiched in between the two, her Jeremy riding in front of Candace and little Suzy behind her. She felt like at any moment, Suzy could strike and take her out easily. Not exactly a warm feeling to have. Candace kept on peddling, despite this sense of danger. “This is so not what I had in mind.”

“Too bad,” Suzy said as she peddled with an evil grin plastered on her face. “because as long as I’m around, Jeremy is mine.”

“Look, girlie,” Candace did her best to look behind her and peddle at the same time. She, upon seeing the cute little girl sitting there, realized that she, perhaps, was being too harsh on her. After all, it was just a case of jealousy, right? “I’m not trying to steal Jeremy from you, Suzy. I could never steal a brother/sister relationship from someone, nor would I try.” Candace smiled warmly and attempted to bond with the girl. Hopefully it would all be better because of this. “So, why can’t we be friends?”

Suzy smiled and held out her hand, appearing like she wanted to do the same.

“See? That wasn’t so–” As soon as Candace grabbed onto Suzy’s tiny hand, she recieved a mild electric shock from a rather strong joy buzzer that was strapped onto Suzy’s finger.

“I don’t like you, is why.” Suzy plainly, and somewhat in an evil tone, replied back. “Get it,” She grasped onto Candace’s hand again, giving her a little shock again. “girlie?

A very singed and soot covered Candace coughed a puff of smoke out of her mouth and looked ahead at the back of Jeremy’s head. “Got it.”


“Alright,” Phineas, now wearing a purple magician’s outfit, stepped up to his brother who was surveying the back of the stage, where a large metal tube now stood. “is everything set up, Ferb?”

Ferb nodded and gave him a thumbs up.

“Sweet! That firework show at the end is really gonna blow everyone away.” Phineas tied his cape off and walked around the stage, stepping onto the it. “Hopefully not in a literal sense…think of the damages that would cause!” He examined the hat that was up there and looked into it to see if there was something inside. There wasn’t, at least not quite yet.

Isabella approached him, now wearing the red dress she had aquired from Ferb. She was fiddling with her fingers, as if something was concerning her. “So, how are you going to get people to come to this, anyway?”

“Oh don’t worry, I took care of that.” Phineas told her with confidence.


“…And that is why I’ll never eat cream cheese again.” Doofenshmirtz wrapped up another one of his odd, but incredibly true backstories of his life to Perry the Platypus. “Thank you for listening, Perry the Platypus. I think we are almost to the house this pizza is to go to.” Doof tapped a small, beeping device on the dashboard. It was poorly duct-taped onto it rather than installed. “At least, I think we are…I can barely read this Locatinator I made. You know, before I went broke.”

Perry sighed and tipped his hat back a little in relief. “Finally…he smells like cheese. And what is this music we’re listening to? Polka? Ugh…

A bus drove up next to the two and Perry immediately saw what was on the side of it: A poster advertising Phineas and Ferb’s magic show with Phineas in his magician garb and Ferb…in a dress again. Isabella was on there as well, also in a dress. To get plenty of people for the show, Phineas had rented yet another advertisement out for the tri-state area to see.

Well, those two certainly know how to advertise, I’ll give them that.

Doofenshmirtz hit a red light suddenly and the van came to a screeching halt. A loud thud came from inside the back of the van, alerting Perry of something. “Ugh, I hate red lights. Why can’t there be only green ones? Or maybe purple. Yes, that’s easier on the eyes, wouldn’t you say, Perry the Platypus?” But, Perry was no longer there as he had unbuckled himself and made his way to the back of the vehicle. Doof noticed this and unbuckled himself quickly. “Perry the Platypus, get back here and buckle yourself in, mister!”

In the back of the van, Perry stumbled upon a large, grey machine with flashing lights on it. It looked a little banged up, but still deadly…at least on Doof’s deadly scale. Which isn’t very deadly at all. “Ah-ha! I knew there was more to this than meets the eye.

Doofenshmirtz quickly ran to the back of the van, and was greeted with many angry drivers and honking horns. “Hold on, hold on! I’ve got one little thing to take care of, and I’ll be on my way!”

“Make it quick!” Someone yelled out to him from one of the cars.

“Or what, buddy?” Doof saw who had yelled at him and winced. He knew pain was about to come because of what he had just done. “Oh, you again…sorry ma’m,” The familiar gruff-voiced woman stepped out of her car and approached him. “I didn’t know–“

Inside the van, all Perry heard was the punch and Doof’s body slamming up against the van. “He still hasn’t learned…do not stop on busy, public streets. Or insult women that could beat him up.

Doofenshmirtz swung open the backdoors to the van, reavealing his new black eye to Perry. “Not a word about this Perry the Platypus.” He pointed to his eye just to clarify what he meant to Perry. “Just step away from the Secret-Revealinator, and no one will be harmed…except for me, who has already been harmed by that extremely tough woman.”

Secret-Reveal-Inator? Wait a moment…’A magician never reveals his secrets’…Phineas and Ferb!” Perry balled up his fist and lowered his brow in anger. “He must be stopped.

Coming Up In Chapter Five: Suzy has her fun with Candace and Doof’s explanation of his no-longer secret evil plot.

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